Supplemental Jurisdiction

Ninja Wednesday

So, almost a year ago I posted a review of a Ninja restaurant in New York. Well, here is like a 5 minute infomercial for Ninja New York. Truth be told, it is kind of boring, but it is also kind of awesome in the way that they are totally serious about their ninjicity. Just like me, only without the boring part because I'm excitement in a fucking bottle. I have no idea what that means.

Electioneering

The municipal general election is this Tuesday. Today, I get a knock on my door from some guy and his kid, and they're campaigning for a woman running for city council.

Me: Hey
Dude: Hi. Just wanted to remind you about the election this Tuesday. If you could find it in your heart, please vote for [city council candidate].
Me: Uh . . . ok?

I wasn't really sure how to respond to "if you could find it in your heart." What is he implying with that phrase? That only cold-hearted bastards would vote for the opponent and that I, as a member of the cold-hearted bastard constituency, need to look deep within myself in order to make the right decision, as opposed to my natural inclination? Or is he saying that this candidate deserves my pity and mercy, like some homeless person down on his luck?

It probably was the first one. Truth is, before that guy showed up on my doorstep, I was going to vote for the candidate who promised to kick more puppies and kittens. I really agreed with his platform that over the last four years, city hall has gone soft on puppies and kittens.

Bracket Busted

A couple of weeks ago I was standing in line at municipal court, waiting to take care of a speeding ticket, when I overheard a conversation between two other attorneys. This was a couple of days before the NCAA announced the brackets for the tournament, and both of these attorneys were Kansas fans.

Attorney 1: So, I just purchased my tickets for St. Louis. Got seats for the regional finals and purchased a hotel room. Cost a small fortune.
Attorney 2: Really? The brackets haven't even come out yet.
Attorney 1: Yeah, but Kansas will be play in the Midwest regional, right? I mean, they'll be a number 1 seed, so they'll put them in the Midwest regional.
Attorney 2: Sure, you're right. Maybe I'll get some tickets too.

So, as someone who dislikes all things KU, you can imagine how hilarious I found this conversation on Selection Sunday when Kansas was placed in the West Regional. Hope those guys like Florida.

Courtroom Experience

I don't write about work very often, for obvious reasons, but I do make it a point to mention funny things that happen to me a work.  That usually doesn't happen.  But last week, I had the best work experience yet.

In my current job, I don't actually go to court very often.  When I do, it is usually to handle traffic tickets.  Last week was one of those times.  As I went up to the bursar to pay the fine and court fees, the teller asked me for the number on the check I was about to hand her.

Me:  Uh, let me see . . . 6 . . . 6 . . . 6.  Oh, snap.

Teller:  Did you just say 666?

Me:  [handing the check to the lady]  Be careful you don't drop that check.  It is heavy metal.

How often do you get to use a line like that in real life?  Like, never.  That almost made the 4-hour excursion to city court worth it.  Almost.

True story.

The Winner

Anyone else see "The Winner" with Rob Corddry on Fox last Sunday? While watching it, at first I thought it was supposed to be a parody of sitcoms because of the totally in-your-face laugh track. Generally, the comedies I like these days are sans laugh track---The Office, My Name Is Earl, 30 Rock. (That's random, those are all on NBC. Maybe they specialize in laugh-trackless comedy.) Even "How I Met Your Mother" (on CBS, ha!), although it has a track, keeps it pretty subtle (to the point I had to go back and watch a clip to see if it even had one because I hadn't really noticed before).

Anyway, The Winner, though, has a laugh track that is ridonkulous in scale, very loud and very ill-timed. I'm not the only one that's noticed this; the N.Y. Times found it grating as well. And it is totally serious about its laugh track; it is not some sort of meta-comedy. The parents act so simplistic and sitcomy that one wonders if Seth MacFarlane, when writing the pilot, thought to himself, "You know, the problem with Growing Pains is that it was just too deep."

All that being said, Rob Corddry is funny and it has potential, but I don't know how long it can last.

While being assaulted by the show's laugh track, though, what really got me thinking was the very existance of laugh track's to begin with. We all know why they're there: They help us laugh at things we might not normally laugh at. They are cues. But, it also reminds me that we tend to laugh in groups, and naturally we want to laugh with other people. The laugh track is really just like artificial friends. And with it, I'm not just sitting in my apartment, eating 3-day old chili and watching television on a Sunday night; the laugh track fools me into thinking I have a life.

Hope Springs Eternal

Tomorrow morning I will awake early to engage in my yearly tradition: buying choice Royals tickets as soon as they become available. And by choice, I mean Cardinals tickets.

UPDATE: It took me 40 minutes to log in and get tickets to that game. Unbelievable. But, still, first base side. Not too shabby.